01 June 2014

Things I Love: Hate-Watching Films


You know when a film comes on and you can feel that you are going to hate nearly everything about it, but you can't quite bring yourself to turn it off? God, I love that. I spend approximately 35% of my film-watching time, watching films that I know I am going to loathe. I don't know why but it just makes me so happy! I know how insane that sounds.

I can nearly pinpoint the exact moment I realised I loved watching terrible films. I was about 11 and Coyote Ugly came out in the cinema.
The worst.
I loathed that film, like properly hated it. And I wouldn't have had a problem with that if any of my friends felt that same, but noooo they LOVED that film. They loved it so fricking much. They swooned over Adam Garcia, they related with Piper Perabo's (very annoying) character, they cried when things took a turn for the worse and they cheered when she (inevitably) got off her ass and sang the damn song. And then we all sang that shitting LeAnn Rimes song. I hate that song. 

When I was 11 I couldn't quite verbalise just what it was I disliked about it so much, I mean, it had an attractive man; what more could I want!? As I got older I realised what was wrong (no likeable characters, shit storyline, too much LeAnn Rimes) but at that age it was just "I just don't like it!". Not that this mattered, for hating that film I have now seen it 13 times (side note; did anybody else know there's like an 'X-Rated' version!? That made for a real shock when we watched it at a sleepover). So, I developed a mechanism that I suggest everyone adopts in times of film desperation--it makes the whole thing easier. Basically, now when I see a film that is painful to watch, I am that asshole in the back snickering at every terrible, inexplicable character decision and pointing out the flaws in pretty much everything. I know, I hate myself too. Generally, I like to hate-watch films by myself because I like having friends and family that can tolerate me, so it's pretty much just me shouting at a screen. I'd stop, but it's just SO MUCH FUN. 

I have 'favourite' films to hate-watch (yes, really) and when I want to get angry at the world, I like to pop these on and rage at the injustice;

1) Twilight (allllll of them)
I already have a blog post about just why I hate this entire phenomena so much here. But despite that hate, I love popping this on just to be baffled at what it is to be a teenager in a modern age. I'm only 25, but this whole thing makes me feel about 60. 

2) A Cinderella Story

So, back in the day I was OBSESSED with Chad Michael Murray (what even happened to him?) when he was on the greatness that was One Tree Hill (currently re-watching-AMAZING). When this film came out, it was a no-brainer. I was seeing this and I was going to love it. Needless to say, I didn't. Hilary Duff seems very nice, but this film is not the pinnacle of acting ability. It is so bad. Like, I physically cringe at some of the lines. And yet, when my sister is watching the DVD, I can't leave the room. PROBLEMS.

3) Wild Child
Yeah, generally it's teen rom-coms that I love/hate. Starring Emma Roberts, this is the ridiculous story of a spoilt American girl shipped off to boarding school in England (identified here as the place of no fun and posh accents) who manages to learn life lessons AND get a hot boyfriend, SCORE! It's amazingly bad, and yet when it's popped on TV (my sister has a terrible DVD collection) I have to stay and watch. 

4) Transformers (allllll of them). In fact, Michael Bay films in general.
The first one wasn't terrible, the rest were SHOCKINGLY bad. Third one didn't even have Megan Fox to make it fun to watch! Michael Bay really does just think hot girls are replaceable action figures. These films make me a little angry actually... Armageddon is also shockingly shite. My older sister said I had no heart if I didn't cry at it, I was too busy being baffled about all the stuff that happened. How did this make sense to anyone!?

5) Anything based on a Nicholas Sparks book
ERGHHHHHHH. And again, BLUURRRGHHH. But also, I love hating these. Never watch Dear John with me. I really hate that film. Amanda Seyfried's character= THE WORST.

So there we go! Those are some of my 'favourite' hate-watch films. Don't ask me why so many are teen rom-coms, I couldn't tell you. I have a whole thing for terrible horror--or more accurately 'horror'--films that I'll go into another time. If you have any films you like to watch to hate, leave me a suggestion because I would love to watch them. I know I'm not the only one that hate-watches films, right!? Apologies to anyone who likes any of the films I've shamed here! If you do like them, drop me a comment and I'll try have a more open mind, or if you're like me and hate them, drop me a comment and we can hate them together!

Byeeeeeeeee :)


Motherhood, films, beauty, and life



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